stressial

4 days ago , i broke up with him. yes. him. nazim clarence. mohd nazim clarence , 315 , sipitang-ian , and one of the guys i met that really fulfill what i want in my dream guy. but not all. something just got in the way.

he rarely texts me , or call me. he's too busy. i'm not used to this. furthermore , i don't know but , it's hard to forget those in my past. i'm scared that either one of us will get hurt. so i let him go. he accept it. he said i'm the perfect one for him. i was really sad that night. i almost cried. but no tears came out. i was determined. and that's the end of me being NC's :'(

i got the matrix offer. labuan. but i want upu ! i'm in a big dilemma right now. whether to go for matrix or wait for upu. stress ! money and documents and everything must be ready for the matrix registration. i have to think about my hair again. they dont want any colored hair there. yea ? so ? damn !

i cried because of that. because i'm too stress to think about this. furthering my study. and i have to think and make a great choice. a right choice* and my BIGGEST PROBLEM now is MONEY 

I'M SO desperate ! TT GOD , help me now please.

aku ada potensi menjadi gila kalau bgney trus ! TT 

macam maw nangis ja lagii. aduy susah nya hidupp. semua DUIT. DUIT DUIT DUIT. mohon mohon larh aku kahwin sama lelaki kaya ka apa ka. stress bgney terus. bukan aku ja kcean. adik2x ku lagi maw belajar. aku lagii paling banyak guna duit. kcean parents ku.

STRESSSIAL !!!!! 

Depressed !

aku pun nda taw larh napa. huh. stress jok. first , c nazim x melayan sa. smua dya ckp dya busy sedja. sejak kami gaduh bp dya x percaya sy tuw. sy ckp sy lbih pntgkn kwn dri dya. oke. my fault sbb kac sakit hati dya. tp dya bukan maw settle bagus bagus. sakit hati bila x kena layan. tp bila dya sms , mcm sa bwt nda taw ja. sa rasa sa takut sa tlmpau syg dya. itu la ni. sa tkut sakit hati. sa takut jadi macam dulu. sa takut kecewa. itula sebab sy bgney. ugh ! stress. what should i do ?

lagi satuuu. smua orang dapat tawaran uni yang bagus2x. sy d cney lagi. hanging. xtaw maw bwt apa jok. haha. itula malas sgt memohon. apa juak sa ney ? -,- bwt alasan sedjaaa. itula jadi bgney. sa kena mrah bh ari tuw. sdih nyaa.

about me tawau and others.

skrg aku maw crta time kmi p twu ari tuw. sa ma pepe. well first dtg sna kna smbut. haha. kiliq kn dorank. cak kmu tgok ney.

kiliq kn dorank. ahaha. then pas ney kmi p mktb. waa , jmpa sgt larh rmai cguu. ehehe. 1 cgu lbih kurg 5 min larh cramahnya. haha. lma jo kmi sna. and kmi jmpa c ijam lg. trus dorank c acap , aloy sma zyan.

bgmbar lg kjap pas ambil slip. haha. then kmi maw p ambl mjalah. tp ndk smpt dohh. bkn ndk smpt. cgu farizan teda. huhu. jln punya jln. sa cri orank bh tuw. tp c khairi ekmal ja sa tjumpa. haha. yg maw d jmpa sbnrnya , teda. lum balik. zz.

lepas tuw , kmi maw balik da. sdih larh TT x tlmpu lma kmi sna. bp parents c atun menunggu kn XD

lepas tuw balik p rumah c atunnn. stay sna kn. mlm tuw kmi tgok lawak ke der 2 sma cerita kita. best. haha. esoknya plak kmi p karnival mara tuw. d dewan masyarakat tawau.

kmi msuk dlm larh kn. lepas tuw byknya orank. haha. byk btul booth di dlm. then 1 1 u kmi p isi borang. antam ja. isi ja kmi blg. haha.

smpi jm 1 lbih ka tuw. bru kmi kluar. d sna tjmpa c kikie , c dyg , c us , c ayin , ijot , ijam , syafiq akmad , acap , azyan , aslan , nizar , pandel , amzar , syafiq akmar , pejal , shadiq , im , nik. hm sepa lg ? nth. lupa da. ney ja sa ingt. haha. trus kmi p mkn. hee. smpt lg bgmbr d tndas XD

trus kmi p gerai dpn servay. kmi mkn martabak jawa , abc milo , abc buah , abc buah + milo and lekor. aish. berliur pula time type ney. maw mkn lg ! ><'

lepas tuw c miemy ndk ikut kmi. dya jln ma cweknya. then kmi p ep. tpt budaq HOT. wkwk. teda bh. kmi nek bus p sna. c pndel kn jnji maw blnja sa. tp xda kmi tjmpa. jauh jua dya. haha. so dya blnja sa relod ja.

kmi sggah dlu p beli mnuman. refresh kjap. haha. trus p cari salon yg hrga dya bpatutan utk highlight rmbut. then jmpa. yeee ~ haha. sa p m'highlight. dorank p jln2x kjap XD

lama tggu pnya lama. haha. akhirnya. yes ! this is what it looks like :D

ahaha. ney lagi 1 XD time tggu kreta bpa c atun ney. c ikok suda dluan balik. dpn grace plaza kmi. hee

balik rumah atun , rehat , mndi , mkn d luar , texting with him <3 then tdur. balik2x sa ttdur mlm tuw sbb pnt. ndk tbalas text dya ><' pastuw webcam sma c pus. ehe. esoknya kmi bgun. 8 lbih p airport. taw ka , rupa2xnya flight c pepe awl. dya t'tggl flight. haha. trus d beli tket mlm. then kmi balik rmh lg. rncg maw sggh mktb ambl mjalah and duit sham kop. tp blg time p airport la. so , tggu pnya tggu. c miemy yg htar kmi. lmbt suda time tuw. tkt t'tggl flight. huh ><' xdpt p mktb. then org yg aku maw jmpa tuw sms. sdihnya. aha. tedala. kwn lma bh tuw. hee.

trus d airport. terep sdih lg ney. haha. pdhal mmg sdih :(

durg curi2x p ambl. ndk sdar. haha.

smpt lagi bhaaa. haha

saat2x berpisah bersama mereka :(

then smpi kk. huh. sdihnya. maw lg lma2x bh. sudala x smpt jmpa smua org. eee TT

btw , this is my current hair now ! :D mcm korea ka ? wkwk. *perasan kejap. haha

terus smlm pnya smlm kn calling bh sma NC. then byk dya ckp. dya ckp dya serius btul sma sa. dya tlmpu suka sa suda. waa. terharu bh TT chee. wkwk. sa pkir dya men2x time dya bwa kpel tuw taw. sa pkir dya kac perasan ja. tp rupanya btul ? aiseh. haha. sa lega larh bh. bp sa pun makin suka da sma dya. sgt2x syg :) ee , jwank. wkwk. apa2x pun , iloveyou :*